The original incident happened between Swami Turiyananda (Brother Disciple of Vivekananda) and Sister Nivedita (Disciple of Vivekananda) on a ship during their trip to America. This incident is falsely attributed sometimes to Vivekananda and his Mother (or) Vivekananda and Sarada Devi (also called Holy Mother). The original incident is as follows:

(During this trip) Swami Turiyananda thought he should learn something of Western customs; so he asked Sister Nivedita to enlighten him. She explained with an illustration. Picking up a knife, she held the sharp edge in her hand and gave the handle to the Swami, saying, 'Swami, whenever you give some thing to someone, always take the inconvenient and unpleasant side yourself and give the convenient and pleasant side to the other.' This, she implied, covered the range of polite behaviour in Western society.